Saturday, March 14, 2015

A Lesson From Cinderella: Have Courage & Be Kind

C * i * n * d * e * r * e * l * l * a

Everyone knows the story of Cinderella. And most people know the new movie came out this Friday, you know, the new Cinderella movie. I won’t give you a synopsis of the movie, nor will I give you a review of it. It’s really not my style to do that, although it’s not a bad idea. But, what I will tell you is that (1) I saw it and (2) the theme of the movie is something I absolutely, positively agree with:
Classy Motto

             Have courage and be kind.


As simple and perhaps scarce as that is, I know that all people that I have personally interacted with have the capacity to be both those embodiments of goodness and have shown that to an extremity. I also know that I, along with the human race, are beyond capable to be anything but courageous and have been guilty of outbursts of anything but kindness, but of: meanness, spitefulness, harshness, pride, point-proving, and the list goes on and on. I know I have done that and I don’t think I’m a bad person. I’m sure you have experienced those emotions as well, and I don’t think anyone else who has done that is a bad person. It’s merely a struggle of how to manage emotions and grow as an individual.

But, then there are those people who are past the point of struggle between doing what is right and following your natural reactions; there are people out there who have no desire to be good, have no desire to be kind, and don’t use courage to do the right thing, but have “courage” to do harmful and hateful things.

An example of this: You know when you are watching the news and they put up a mug-shot of the ‘person of interest’ the police have been chasing for weeks and “his (or her) ” picture is up because there is news to report: they finally caught him. When you look at their demeanor you sense something of darkness in his eyes, and you hear people who have associated with him comment about him as, “evil”.

Yes, that is out there as well. It doesn't exactly scream that all people are good, or to trust in humanity. If anything, it is more reason to close your heart, lock your doors at night, get a pit-bull and get an alarm system. It also makes you not want to look at people in the eye when you are walking in the city at night and to clutch to your wallet and purse as you go about your business. HOWEVER, as realistic as these circumstances are and as much as I agree with being careful and protective, there is also so much room in this imperfect world we live in to be a ray of hope that there are good people in this world, and that there is mercy for everyone. At one point or another, we will all be at the mercy of human emotions and human reactions. If that is so, we better practice for one day we will be the recipient.

I believe that in order to “have courage and be kind”, that we need to be observant.
There are two scenarios from this past week that have shown me that as much as I want to be the recipient of kindness, that being kind takes courage and being observant helped me, perhaps, make a difference in a justice-seeking world.

Perfect Bread-stick Placement
Jiana--Besties for Life
Last Saturday I went to the Olive Garden in Salt Lake City with my home girl, JLowe. That’s right, JLowe. (Keep in mind, she was around before JLo, and has infamy in her own right.) My best friend Jenny and I were out gallivanting at this point, in the Olive Garden. While she fed the lion wall adoration a bread stick, while we devoured our soup and salad, I noticed our waiter helping other customers. For some reason, I noticed his lip kept quivering. Crying? That was quickly ruled out, he had no tears. Our middle-aged, perhaps toupee-wearing server seemed to have an inability to stop his mouth from quivering and Parkinson’s came to mind. He was kind and thoughtful and tried to hide his ailment. When he was gone a different waitress asked if she could take our plates away and went on how she “couldn't believe he didn't take your plates”.

“Oh, I didn't notice, it’s okay,” I said.

“No, he’s new. He should have taken these for you.” She said.

A tad uncalled for, if you ask me…was she trying to make him look bad? Although our meals were only about $10 each at the end (thanks to Jenny’s gift card), I felt beyond impressed that this fellow needed a pick-me-up.

A $20 tip? Sure, why not.

Can I afford that? Haha. That means “no”, however, sometimes you have to have the courage to do something outside of yourself trusting that God will take care of you because you are taking care of His.

Sunday was a new story. After church, don’t ask me how, but we found ourselves in Whole Foods. I had resolved to not buy anything. Everything at the store looks more amazing when you are hungry…and well, duh, when you are at Whole Foods. But, as I was waiting around for others to finish up, I noticed this seemingly homeless man with tears in his eyes scoop and scrape the bins at the salad bar filling his very tall container. Observing him close-by I wanted to ask him, “What’s wrong? Why are you crying?” however, that felt super random and super rude. And, well, I guess at the moment, I was extra wussy.
Classy Sign-age from Whole Foods


I walked away, but kept watching him from a distance. (Creepy? Thank you!) I knew something was wrong although didn’t know him. But, for some reason, I couldn't look away.

He walked up to the cashier and by the body language and the delay to pay, something was wrong. I was too far to hear him, but I started to walk closer and closer because although I was not courageous enough to talk to him at an opportune time, I couldn't let a second chance to follow this prompting slip away. He wasn't paying but the cashier was talking to him. When I got close enough to hear, I heard the cashier say,

“You can get a smaller cup and fill that up.”

Without thinking, I made my entrance, “Does he not have enough?”

“No, he doesn’t.”

Ignoring the fact that it was a Sunday, I said, “Well, I’ll pay for it.”

Also ignoring the fact that I just blew a LOT of my paycheck buying new glasses the day before and wondering if I budgeted enough to pay the rest of my obligations for the next few weeks, I got out my plastic and he swiped my card. At the time, I wondered if I was doing the right thing, that maybe I’m being helpful but I will be in a rough-patch later but sometimes you have to not be rational.

$16.88

He turned to me:

“Hi, I’m Julius.”
Julius shook my hand and thanked me profusely, “Thank you, thank you,  thank you so much.”

“Hey, it’s okay. Good luck with everything.”

I only regret not asking him his story and where he was from, what he was doing and how things were going…but, at least, maybe, he feels like in the vast world we live in, where people only look out for their own and where you “can’t trust anyone” that he had a glimmer of hope that there is good in the world.

I know that I had a more solidified understanding of God’s love for all his children in all their different stages of life and more compassion for those that don’t seem to catch any breaks.

If one day, I find myself without $16.88 to get food in my belly, to find a place to rest my head, or to feel like I’m a human-being, I perhaps will have faith that I will be given a moment of grace, because no matter what good I do in this world, I am flawed. We all are. And, because of that, there is more reason to have courage and be kind.

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